I can't do it anymore. By "do it", I mean maintain the illusion, flimsy disguise as it was, that I'm an active member of DeviantART. I'm probably abandoning the art of writing altogether..... all m inspiration is gone... I feel hopeless... any few ideas I think of, I can never deliver on them. So, there's no point in continuing my efforts here.

Anyway, no more comments, no more updates, no more submissions. I quit. Again.

I'm sure someone, somewhere, just won a bet.

I missed a journal entry. Again. Sorry. Again. I've got no excuses, and frankly, the no excuses excuse is starting to become tired. Is tired. Hell, it makes me want to puke just seeing me use it again. "Sorry, I screwed up again, my bad." Ugh... Even though I said it was gonna be better this time around, I've slipped drastically. Again. BIG surprise. Another promise I've managed to bone. >> Join the club. >> They've got nametags.

I'm behind in Deviations and Journals... mainly, I've completly neglected to comment on anything by ~EMOisLOOOVE since... last month, I want to say? At least a month's worth of days ago. Plus, I'm pretty backed up on journals. I could blame it on my computer being out of service, but I still should have caught up by now... instead, I'm fartin' around on the net, playing this new MMORPG Trickster that I found, watching TV, eating, and sleeping.... nothing else, really. Being an overall, lazy waste of space, really. Hell, my computer would have been back up MUCH sooner if I'd gotten together the willpower to get on it sooner. It wouldn't have even stopped working if I'd been more proactive! ....... but, then again, story of my life. Snoozin' and losin'.

Anyway, the main point of this journal is a re-attempt at a challenge I accepted a long time ago... and never did anything on. Again, BIG surprise. >> I promised its fulfuillment to a lot of people... and never got past the first one. But, here it is again, to raise its ugly mug and continue to mock me. The 100 [Sonnet] Challenge

001. Introduction
002. Love
003. Light
004. Dark
005. Seeking Solace
006. Break Away
007. Heaven
008. Innocence
009. Drive
010. Breathe Again
011. Memory
012. Insanity
013. Misfortune
014. Smile
015. Silence
016. Questioning
017. Blood
018. Rainbow
019. Gray
020. Fortitude
021. Vacation
022. Mother Nature
023. Cat
024. No Time
025. Trouble Lurking
026. Tears
027. Foreign
028. Sorrow
029. Happiness
030. Under the Rain
031. Flowers
032. Night
033. Expectations
034. Stars
035. Hold My Hand
036. Precious Treasure
037. Eyes
038. Abandoned
039. Dreams
040. Rated
041. Teamwork
042. Standing Still
043. Dying
044. Two Roads
045. Illusion
046. Family
047. Creation
048. Childhood
049. Stripes
050. Breaking the Rules
051. Sport
052. Deep in Thought
053. Keeping a Secret
054. Tower
055. Waiting
056. Danger Ahead
057. Sacrifice
058. Kick in the Head
059. No Way Out
060. Rejection
061. Fairy Tale
062. Magic
063. Do Not Disturb
064. Multitasking
065. Horror
066. Traps
067. Playing the Melody
068. Hero
069. Annoyance
070. 67%
071. Obsession
072. Mischief Managed
073. I Can't
074. Are You Challenging Me?
075. Mirror
076. Broken Pieces
077. Test
078. Drink
079. Starvation
080. Words
081. Pen and Paper
082. Can You Hear Me?
083. Heal
084. Out Cold
085. Spiral
086. Seeing Red
087. Food
088. Pain
089. Through the Fire
090. Triangle
091. Drowning
092. All That I Have
093. Give Up
094. Last Hope
095. Advertisement
096. In the Storm
097. Safety First
098. Puzzle
099. Solitude
100. Relaxation

I'm no artist, so when I accepted this challenge, I decided to do 100 Shakespearian sonnets instead. So, prepare for some hype for the first week, then about two weeks of depression and frustration, then pretending it never happened for months on end while silently suffering. ...I have to keep trying, though. I'm REEEEAAALLLLYYY sick of it, but I have to, because to stop trying it to stop living.... and I've already tried to walk that road. It isn't a splendid road, and I've heard the destination ain't so great, neither..... besides, I've got a big reason to keep trying, now... so I'll keep trying. And, most likely, failing. Again. And again. And again. And again. And again. And again. And again. And again. And again. And again. And again. And again. And again. And again. And again.......

All my love,
Aaron "Ruffles" Kaczmarek

Again.

EDIT:: !?!?!? MY COMPUTER DOESN'T COME WITH MICROSOFT WORD?!?!?! ....... >> Notepad.... you and me are about to become very close....

>> I've been tagged... well, let me first explain why I was gone. My computer contracted a virus in WMV that eventually destroyed my OS, and it isn't until recently that I managed to get it fixed. Voila. Now for this thing...... -_- And I'm not doing it alone.

1. YOUR NAME:
Wixx: Alias Wixx, true name Aaron.
Ruffles: >> I hate you.... Komo.
Makani: Makani... o-o I sense issue with this... We're gonna need geneologies...
Wixx: DX I'll improvise! ONWARD!

2. YOUR GANGSTA NAME: (first 3 letters of real name plus izzle)
Wixx: Aarizzle, my nizzle fo shizzle. =3 And yes, I actually know what that means.
Ruffles: Komizzle? o-o Not bad.
Makani: Makizzle! Its a good thing the third letter in each of our names is a consonant.

3. YOUR DETECTIVE NAME: (fav colour and fav animal)
Aaron: Black Tiger... like the darkness of my soul. *shot* x-x Sweet death. *dismantled*
Ruffles: o-o ... Red Rat? Believe it or not, the cat likes rats... ._. Not as food.
Makani: Pink Dove..... ;-; That's too femenine sounding for me.
Wixx: >> Your favorite color is pink. Your favorite animal is a dove. << Doesn't get more manly than that.
Makani: ;-; Shut up.

4. YOUR SOAP OPERA NAME: (middle name, and current street)
Wixx: Joseph Frenora... Maribel? Maribel! ... Fernando?! Fer..Fernado... POR QUUEEEE?!?!?!
Ruffles: .....
Makani: .....
Wixx: o-o Right, you need middle names...
Ruffles: >> And homes.
Wixx: ...... ;-; I win?
Ruffles&Makani:

5. YOUR STAR WARS NAME: (the first 3 letters of your last name, first 2 letters of your first name, last 3 letters of mum's maiden name)
Wixx: o-o I don't know my mum's maiden name. She died when I was a kid, and I've never looked much into her when I got older.... the memories... arn't very pleasent.
Ruffles: >> Shut it, emo kid, and use your step-mom's maiden name.
Wixx: T_T
Ruffles: >> Don't know that either? ... How about the name from her last marriage?
Wixx: o-o That'll work. Kacaaill.... T_T How the hell do you pronounce that?
Ruffles: Metkotor. =3 Not too shabby.
Makani: Permalac. ^^ Helluva lot better than Wixx's.
Wixx: ;-;

6. YOUR SUPERHERO NAME: (2nd favorite color, favorite drink)
Wixx: o-o Red Mountain Dew. =3
Ruffles: Orange Water? o-O Am I vegetarian pee?
Makani: Blue Milk.... o-o From a sad cow?

7. YOUR IRAQI NAME: (2nd letter of your first name, 3rd letter of your last name, any letter of your middle name, 2nd letter of your mums maiden name, 3rd letter of you dads middle name, 1st letter of a siblings first name, last letter of your mums middle name)
Wixx: ;-; Ho
Ruffles: ;-; Ly
Makani: ;-; Shit
Wixx: Acheote? ;-; I had to improvise for my mum's last name.
Ruffles: >> Pass.
Makani: << Ditto.
Ditto: XD DITTO! *turns into Makani*
Ruffles: >> Oh, good. Stress relief. *destroys Ditto*

8. YOUR WITNESS PROTECTION NAME: (mum/dads middle name)
Wixx: >> Thomas.
Ruffles: o-o Um...
Makani: o-O Urm...
Wixx: -_- I know, I know... no middle names... I'll just pick random names for yah. *snaps*
Ruffles: Percival. DX WHAT?!
Makani: Asshole... ;-; That's not nice.

9. YOUR GOTH NAME: (black, and the name of one your pets)
Wixx: Black Pumpkin. XD Hah! Totally suits me.
Ruffles: o-o I don't have a pet.
Wixx: =3 Think about it.
Ruffles: >> I will squeeze your head till it pops like a balloon.
Wixx: o//o Oh, my.
Ruffles: ..... O_O MROW?! @-@ *dies a lot on the inside*
Makani: Black Ria. -_^ Hello, my pet-- *torn to particles*

-_- And that's that. Now go away.

All my love,
Kacaaill Acheote

I live! Details later!

All my love,
Aaron "Ruffles" Kaczmarek

Wixx? Oh. He's still not here? Why? Because he's lazy in terms of getting his computer back up and running and is paying the dear price of having to use the phone to talk to people. It's terrible as both he and I HATE the phone. (This is by the way. )

Either way, he wishes to give love and presents to for her 20th birthday. She rocks and much love to the taggles and such. He misses ya!

And to the dear friend of his going to California, he wishes fun and joy and he'll talk to you again when he gets back online.

Either way folks, he'll get back online soone enough, he just got over a nice sickness, which means he wonm't have many more excuses for taking so long. I give it another week, hopefully. I think I've pretty much used up my cell minutes for the year. Yikes.

And as he is currently attacted to my ear, he wishes to add a quote from War and Peace. "Life sucks and everything smells like poo." Not an actual quote, but that's what he said not too long before I finally got the phone off my ear. Nyrrrrr.

Either way, our favorite writer will be back online in a few days, give him time, and throw things at him when he's back, yey!

And if you're waiting for comments, kiss your butts and beg forgiveness since this is his account and I'm not about to waste three hours of my cell phone time trying to be the middleman describing deviations to him so I can type in his comments for you. PATIENCE! RAWRG!

-Your Lady and Mistress,
Ria

Warning: Do not Lysol the bathtub and light a match.